Possible or impossible

“It always seems impossible until it’s done.” - Nelson Mandela

Something that really fascinates me is how easy we believe something is impossible, and yet we find it so difficult to believe the opposite – that something is indeed possible.  

Why is it easier to believe the negative?  Is it because we don’t trust ourselves or is it because we don’t have faith in ourselves?  Or is it simply because we are afraid of failing?

Both positive and negative thoughts originate from the same mind.  I am a firm believer in positive thoughts and I want to encourage you to monitor yourself.  The moment you have a negative thought, try and turn it into a positive thought. 

The way we are

“We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are.” ―  Anais Nin

The intricacies of life are absolutely fascinating.  

Without a doubt our frame of reference determines how we see things.  This means that it is open for interpretation and understanding, with a fair amount of bias linked thereto.  Past experiences do play a role as we become who we are because of what we go through. 

We should all change our glasses to look at life with fresh eyes and see things the way they are and not the way we are.

A scenic drive

 “I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.” ― Douglas Adams, The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul

Maybe you feel as if you’re not where you are supposed to be.  For some reason we end up on the sideline of life where one feel as if you are stuck, that nobody sees your full potential, that you are ignored... 

Nothing happens coincidentally.  Everything happens for a reason.  Somewhere in the future you will look back at this time and realise that you were exactly where you were supposed to be.

Even though you are not where you intended to go, think of it as the scenic drive.

Authenticity

“It is better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you are not.” ―  Andre Gide 

Who are you? 

Are you true to yourself or are you projecting an ‘acceptable’ image?  Do you say and do the right things in front of the right people?  Do you project one image at work and another at home? 

Don’t you think you are crucifying the real you?   In all fairness, it doesn’t guarantee acceptance.  Every time the powers that be changes, you have to change your personality again.  Besides it being very tiring to play a role, it is not sustainable.  Sooner or later the real you will surface. 

Authenticity is a scarce, but much needed commodity in the world of business.

This is life

“Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.” - John Lennon

Despite our strategies and meticulous planning, we often learn that it’s not going to happen the way we plan it. 

Just when we think that we’ve made it life throws a curve ball at us.  Our relationships go sour... our children do the unthinkable... we run out of funds... we are not the successful candidate... we lose battles... we make wrong decisions... we don’t get the bonus or increase we bargained on... we trust the wrong people...

Albeit this is life.

Life goes on; with or without you

“In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.”  - Robert Frost

As insensitive as it might sound, the world is not going to a halt just because you got hurt.  Even if you feel as if it is the end of the world, life continues. 

It is ok to cry a little; to have a pity party, but there comes a time that you’ll have to wipe the tears and face the world again. 

Unfortunately life goes on; with or without you.

Lemons or Lemonade?

Life is not what it is supposed to be…  it’s the way it is…  The way we cope with it is what makes the difference…

Life is not always plain sailing.  Sooner or later the winds of change blow across the calm waters, turning the once calm and beautiful sea into a raging ocean.  

You don’t have control over what happens to you, but you can choose how to react.   If life deals you lemons, do you make lemonade or do you just see the lemon and think what on earth can one do with a simple lemon? 

In every disappointment lurks an opportunity.   

Break the shell

To eat an egg, you must break the shell.  ~Jamaican Proverb

To achieve a different result, you need to do something different.  

Somehow we just don’t get this.  We complain about our boring job, how unhappy we are with our circumstances, about our partner’s flaws... but we don’t do anything to break the spell.  No wonder Albert Einstein says: “Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.” 

As much as you are hoping or wishing that things will change, they are not just going to change, you need to do something different.

Miracles don’t just happen, they require a catalyst - break the shell.

What is at the centre of your life?

Whatever is at the centre of our life will be the source of our security, guidance, wisdom, and power. ~Stephen Covey

What does your life revolve around?  What is the single most important object/entity/article (thing) in your life?  What is it that you will live or die for? 

Is it your career, family, financial freedom, a new car/house, an overseas holiday, retirement, your husband/wife, another position...?  Sadly so many of us seem to define ourselves in what we own and/or our achievements. 

It might be an interesting exercise to ask yourself whether this one ‘thing’ is the source of your security, guidance, wisdom and power?

Always see the possibilities

“So why don't I want it anymore?  Well, my tale is a bit of a sad one, but I am not trying to sell you a sob story. I appreciate that many people have had to cope with much more than I have, and have had much more sadness in their lives. This is just my way of dealing with what has happened to me.”

On the 29^th of June 2008, the eBay auction ended.  Someone bought Ian Usher’s life for a couple of hundred thousand Australian dollars. 

As promised, he went to the airport, enquired when the next plain with an available seat is departing, and started a new life.  “I have had goals and dreams for as long as I can remember, but like everyone else, I have found that living often gets in the way, and goals get put aside for too long!  It's time to start ticking off some goals.  It's time to achieve 100 goals in the next 100 weeks!”

“I am pretty excited about the whole thing. I am looking forward to moving on, and shedding the past. I am excited about the future, and really having no idea where events might lead me.  It's time to let it all go and move on.”

Out of this rather tragic story developed some wonderful possibilities.  Walt Disney pictures bought the rights to his story.  He published two books “A life 4 sale” and “A life sold.” Ian Usher is having the time of his life. 

"No matter how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights and see the possibilities.  Always see them, for they're always there." Taken from "The American Dreams by James R. Bickford                                           The end.

Every problem has in it the seeds of its own solution

"Every problem has in it the seeds of its own solution. If you don't have any problems, you don't get any seeds." – Norman Vincent Peale

Ian Usher decided to sell his whole life via eBay.  “I have a great life. I live in a nice house in a beautiful area of a fantastic city, in one of the most amazing countries in the world.  I have a car, a motorbike, a jet ski, spa, and much more. I live a great lifestyle; I go skydiving, snowboarding, diving, jet skiing, kite boarding. I have some great friends. I have a good job working with some wonderful people.”  

However, after the divorce he was surrounded by the memorabilia of their past, living in the same house, with the same furniture, driving the same car.  It was just too much for Ian.  “I am going to sell my life!!  Everything I have and everything I am.  On the day it is all sold and settled I intend to walk out of my front door with my wallet in one pocket and my passport in the other, nothing else at all, and get on the next plain/train, with no idea where I am going or what the future holds for me.''

Just imagine the emotional turmoil this man must have experienced to get to this stage.  Maybe you can associate with his feelings. 

To be continued...

Accept the things to which fate binds you...

“Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.” Marcus Aurelius

Ian Usher was born in 1963 in the north east of England, and had a very happy childhood growing up in the small market town of Barnard Castle.

After school he took a year off, and travelled to Israel to work on a kibbutz, and eventually headed home via Egypt and much of Europe.  He went to college in Liverpool where he acquired a Bachelor degree in Education.  He specialised in teaching outdoor education, at one time working for the British Rail after which he became a self-employed trainer/facilitator.  He was a very dynamic man who supplemented his income by becoming involved in many other business ventures.

Upon a visit to Australia he met Laura.  They were together for 12 years, 5 of which they were married.  When the marriage came to an abrupt end Ian decided:  “I’ve had enough of my life.  I don't want it anymore!  You can have it if you like!”  Bruce’s idea of many years ago came to fruition.  Ian decided to sell his life.

Sounds like your own story?  To be continued...

A life 4 sale

“Our attitude toward life determines life's attitude towards us.”  ~ John N. Mitchell quotes

Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and you cry alone.     

Going through change is not easy.  For some it might feel as if you have reached the end of the road.  Maybe you have said:  “I have had enough of my life!”  The memories of what you had before, the friendships that are lost, coping with these changes are just too much for you.  You don’t want to continue. 

It is ok to feel this way.  In fact many of us have felt this way before, but very few of us do something about it.  Ian Usher’s friend Bruce uttered these exact words years before adding that he felt like selling his life: “lock, stock and barrel.”  These words remained dormant in Ian’s mind until something triggered him to feel exactly the same way.  The world moved into the age of technology and for Ian it was easier.  He decided to put Bruce’s good idea into action!  A life 4 sale - his.

To be continued tomorrow…

Walls or bridges?

Given bricks – do we build a wall or a bridge? (Unknown)

Every morning each and every one of us receives a new stack of bricks.  Most of us will use it to build walls to protect us from the hurt that others have caused us.  Some will even extend the existing walls because they have experienced hurt before. 

However, using the same bricks, we can build a bridge.  It can be very lonely behind those walls.  Give someone a (2^nd, 3^rd) chance today. 

Restore those fragile relationships, whether it is work, family or friendship related.  I want to encourage you to build a bridge today.

The Fee for success

“The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one…” ~ Elbert Hubbard, The Notebook, 1927

Maybe you are sitting with a truly genius idea/concept, but you are so scared of failing that you don’t even attempt to make it happen.   It might even be that you tried before, failed and now you are scared of failing again.   Unfortunately you cannot succeed if you don’t try. 

Failure is part of life; it is the fee you pay for success.

Do the right thing

“In the end, you should always do the right thing, even if it’s hard…”  ~ Nicholas Sparks

During Monday morning school assembly, our Afrikaans speaking principal used to say:  “It is not done, it just is not done!”  His English might not have been perfect, but he got the message across i.e. certain behaviour was not acceptable neither would it be tolerated.  In the eyes of a scholar, the lecture was normally about something trivial, such as papers strewn on the school ground, but we learnt what was allowed and what was deemed to be totally out of line. 

To always do the right thing, can be challenging, but it is a good habit that will reap rewards over time.  Do the right thing, even if it is hard.