N O

N O = Next opportunity – You magazine

The word “no” is defined as negative.  It’s a word that we hear from a very young age.  The word ‘no’ immediately barricades you from what you want.  No is synonym to being deprived, not getting your way.  We often say no to others, to our children and sometimes even to ourselves.

Are you tired of hearing this little word?  Maybe change your perspective.  "NO" is not a negative, it is merely your ‘Next Opportunity’. 

Nothing that is worthwhile is ever easy

“Nothing that is worthwhile is ever easy…  Remember that…”  ~ Nicholas Sparks, Message in a Bottle…

Take a little trip down memory lane.  Think of the things that happened in your life that you would define as worthwhile. 

Did they come easy?  Did they just happen?  Did you feel like giving up?  Are you glad you persevered?

Share

“Life ends when you stop dreaming…

Hope ends when you stop believing…

Love ends when you stop caring…

And Friendship ends when you stop sharing!!”  ~ Anonymous

Have you ever shared something that makes you very happy with someone close to you and the other person is just as happy as you are?  Sharing normally multiplies the effect and it strengthens the friendship.

On the other hand, when you share something heartbreaking with a friend, it takes the burden off you.   The pain is less and the friendship is stronger.

How amazing is that?  And yet, so many of us carry our burdens alone.  We cherish and treasure them and in the process they make us ill. 

Share and start dreaming again... while you’re awake.  Dreams are the breeders of hope.  Never ever stop dreaming.  Dream the impossible dream.  In fact, start visualising your dreams.  You will be amazed by the power of the mind. 

I would never be able to...

 “The word impossible is not in my dictionary.” - Napoleon Bonaparte

There’s an old Afrikaans saying:  “Kannie is dood van kruiwastoot”, meaning it is unacceptable to say you can’t.  We can do anything that we put our minds to or at least anything we really want to. 

Just think back to when you got your first cell phone.  You looked at it and thought you will never be able to master the use thereof.  Today we can hardly do without it.

How can one expect to succeed if you don’t even give yourself a chance?  We often give up before we even tried.  “I would never be able to...”  Sounds familiar?

Perspective

Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you have – Hyman Juda Schachtel

We are never pleased with what we have.  Whether it is big or small, is irrelevant.  Even when we have the item, we want a bigger or better version.  A pair of jeans is not good enough; it has to be a specific brand... A roof over our head is not good enough; it has to be of a certain size, in a certain suburb...  Bread is not good enough; it has to be ...  Somehow we always think of the next item to buy.  This causes us to feel discontented.

It doesn’t mean that we should not strive to better ourselves or that we shouldn’t have ambition, but we do take it too far and in the process we put more stress on ourselves than what is necessary.

Ever thought of wanting what you have i.e. living in harmony with yourself?  He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the world = Marcus Aurelius

The book of life

In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.  ~Charlie Brown

If only I knew... In hindsight we have all the answers, but it would have been nice to have the answers when we needed them. 

Unfortunately, the answers are nowhere to be found.  Life is about trial and error and just to play safe, a good dose of planning.  We learn as we go along.  There is no manual. 

But just imagine how boring life would have been if we had all the answers or we knew what the future hold.  Instead, we have the opportunity to write our own books.

Unfulfilled Dreams

Someone once said that the richest piece of real estate is the local cemetery where all the unfulfilled dreams and unused talents are buried.

This quote saddens me because it is so true.  Everyone has dreams, but how many of those dreams are realised?  Who says they must remain a dream?  Unfortunately nobody is going to wave a magic wand either.  They are your dreams after all.

Share them with someone whom you trust or write them down.  Maybe your dream can take the form of a bucket list i.e. a list of things you wish to do before you die.  Categorise them in terms of importance.   Put an action plan into place; one with deadlines.  What needs to be done by when?  Re-visit your dreams/list regularly and check how you are doing.  Be hard on yourself.

Would you rather regret the things you did one day, than regret the things you didn’t do?

Everything is theoretically impossible

“Everything is theoretically impossible, until it is done.” - Robert A. Heinlein

To demonstrate the truth in the above quote, one can just look at the best times athletes achieved over the years.  In the early sixties, nobody thought it was possible to run the 100 metres (100 yards those days equal 91.44 m) in under 10 seconds. 

However in 1968 Jimmy Hines broke the 10 second mark – the impossible was achieved.   Do you think Jimmy Hines achieved it because he thought it was impossible?  Definitely not.  I am convinced he said to himself:  “I can do this!” 

Today Usain Bolt’s world record is standing at 9.58 seconds and even women are now running it in less than 10 seconds.  Can it be done in less than 9 seconds?   Theoretically no, but it is possible.

Pass all the pebbles

Nobody trips over mountains.  It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble.  Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain.  ~Author Unknown

We have become masters of making mountains of mole hills.  A simple rumour can turn into a tsunami of concerns.  It is indeed the smallest jackal that ruins the vineyard. 

What is it about half a truth that causes us to believe them so easily?  Half the truth is no longer the truth, it is a lie.  Let’s be vigilant and spot these half truths and rumours and sidestep them. 

“Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you’ve crossed the mountain.”

How big is your imagination?

Whoever said the sky’s the limit, has no imagination – unknown

How many times have you heard the phrase “The sky’s the limit”, before? 

Yet, the simple verbalization of the phrase, limits us.   One can never limit your imagination and therefore you cannot limit your abilities. 

If you believe in it, there is no limit.

Cheer somebody up today

The best way to cheer you up, is to try to cheer somebody else up.  ~Mark Twain

Once you focus on someone else’s problems, you forget about your own. 

When you go through a tough time, try and do something good for a colleague or friend.  Life can keep us so occupied that we hardly notice our best friend’s tears. 

Maybe we’re selfish.  Maybe it is time for a paradigm shift.  Let's focus external and no longer internal; on others and not ourselves.

Snakes & Ladders

“Take chances, make mistakes. That's how you grow. Pain nourishes your courage. You have to fail in order to practice being brave.” ~ Mary Tyler Moore quotes

Life is like a game of Snakes and Ladders.  Just when you think you’ve climbed the ladder of success, there’s a snake that swallows you and there you go... back to square one.  

Unlike with a game, you can’t even say that you no longer want to play.  Life goes on; with or without you.  People hardly stop to ask whether you are ok. 

Be brave, because you will fail somewhere along the road.  Although it will be painful, remember:  “Pain nourishes your courage.” 

“ It is not about how you ran the race, but about how you finished it.”

One step closer

I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday.  ~Author Unknown –

The good news is that if you don’t do anything, you also cannot make any mistakes.  Does that mean you are successful?  

Keep going.  Keep trying.  If you fall off the bicycle, get right back on.  Gary Player said:  “The more he practised, the better he became.”

Most people fail because they give up; because they failed trying.  Every time you fail, you are one step closer to your next success. 

Are your troubles bigger than your imagination?

“If I had my life to live over, I would perhaps have more actual troubles, but I would have fewer imaginary ones…” ~ Don Herold

Life would be extremely boring if we don’t have troubles.  Trouble adds spice to our lives. 

I know you say that you can do without spice, but food without salt and the right amount or mixture of spices is not exactly a gourmet meal.  How would one ever know how wonderful a day without trouble is, if you haven’t been tried and tested before?  

How many of our troubles are real or are our worries premature?  Maybe they’re just a product of our imagination? 

“May your troubles always be smaller than your imagination…”

Don't give up

“Anyone can give up, it’s the easiest thing in the world to do…  But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength…”  ~ Anonymous

Each and every one of us, somewhere in our lives, experienced a time where we thought that we have reached the end of the road; that we just cannot continue. 

Life is not easy and on a lighter note; we’re not going to get out of it alive.  It is not easy to continue when every fibre inside of you reached breaking point.  At that point, giving up even seems like a solution, but it is not. 

You can continue, because you have managed to make it through the storm before.  You are inherent strong and you have the ability to continue.  Just give it one more go... 

Plant some seeds

“Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds that you plant…”  ~ Robert Louis Stevenson

Humans, by nature, are greedy creatures.  Most people love to receive.  What’s in it for me?

We compare presents.  I spent so much and look what I’m receiving. 

We want to be acknowledged and praised. 

Life can be so much more rewarding if we rather sow (plant) some seeds.  Seeds of friendship: caring, giving...  It is better to give than to receive. 

Be bold, try it.  Even if you just manage to do it for a day, you are going to be amazed at how it will add value to your own existence.

Problems, stopsigns and guidelines

Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines.  ~Robert Schuller

Sometimes we are paralyzed by problems.  Problems bring everything to a standstill.  However, today’s problems are the lessons we learn, that prepares us for tomorrow. 

It’s almost a given that we will make mistakes.  One of the biggest successes, the Post-it note, was discovered because someone made a mistake. 

I’ve taken some wrong turns along the way, but boy, did I discover some wonderful places in the process?   Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines...

Today is a gift

“That's the secret to success -- not worrying only about what's going to happen in the future, trying to work only on the stuff you can work on in the present.” ~ Dwight Howard quotes

It would be interesting to see how much time we spend on worrying.  Besides worrying about what happened, we worry about what could, should, would or might happen. 

Worry empowers your fears.  If you don’t worry, your fears can’t grow.  Just imagine if you spend the same amount of time on positive thoughts...  Every day has exactly the same amount of time and we can achieve so much more if we just concentrate on the present. 

There is a reason why it is called the present.  Today is a gift, yesterday is only a memory and tomorrow belongs to the future. 

Lights, camera...

Most people would rather be certain they're miserable, than risk being happy.  ~Robert Anthony

It is not easy to be happy and friendly all the time, but surely it cannot be easy to be miserable all the time either. 

If you laugh, everyone laughs with you... but if you cry... well you know, you normally cry alone.  When an actor goes on stage, they act the role.  Surely you won’t see an actor who is acting a happy role, being miserable. 

Leo Buscaglia once said:  “If you’re happy, please tell your face about it.”  Maybe we should go ‘on stage’ when we get to work.  Lights, camera, smile...

Leave no stone unturned

To find what you seek in the road of life, the best proverb of all is that which says:  "Leave no stone unturned." ~ Edward Bulwer Lytton

If you have to look back one day, would you rather say sorry for what you did, or sorry for what you didn’t do?  Never ever give up.  Ask... try... do... fail... try again.  Try a different approach... learn from mistakes... go places that you would never have gone...try what you never thought of doing, but just never ever do nothing.  

Nothing lasts forever

“The best way out is always through…”  ~ Robert Frost

Sometimes we just want to run away or give up. 

We all experience difficulties and we all deal with them differently, but if you continue, you will reach the end sooner or later. 

Nothing lasts forever, not the good times, but luckily, neither does the bad times.